tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post4676248415346899915..comments2024-01-08T00:18:57.750+00:00Comments on Gay Banker: Email about subtle homophobia in everyday lifeGBhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07046768019709916759noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-44054532016950509452012-07-15T11:32:35.672+01:002012-07-15T11:32:35.672+01:00I hate the "new school" way of using (ab...I hate the "new school" way of using (abusing) the word "gay". My kids are year 6 and 5. I remember the eldest one said something like "eww, that food is so gay".<br /><br />Of course I picked her up on it immediately. She'd obviously heard it used in the playground. I explained why she shouldn't use "gay" in this way and she assured me that she would not.<br /><br />It's important to quash this misuse if/when it rears its ugly head. <br /><br />to be honest, I don't think that the young kids are being homophobic in any way, but it doesn't matter, that's not the point.Adult Sex Toyshttp://www.adultsextoyscity.co.uknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-89779649396469093592012-06-17T13:34:25.321+01:002012-06-17T13:34:25.321+01:00Yeah! I often wished I was quick witted so I can r...Yeah! I often wished I was quick witted so I can respond to their jokes with a funny comeback.<br /><br />I wonder if there is a basic / generic formula to return insult in a funny way. If there is one or a few, that would be awesome!the immigayranthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09847424313633712048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-50240830272783377882012-06-16T16:47:51.468+01:002012-06-16T16:47:51.468+01:00What a cool blog! Great posts mate, I've just ...What a cool blog! Great posts mate, I've just started mine - another gay guy tryna get thru life - I hope to come out this year so am documenting it - good idea? lol<br /><br />Subscribe to mine gaybanker - would be cool to have you as a follower!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06668794880509141606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-1665194517474863332012-06-08T17:00:27.522+01:002012-06-08T17:00:27.522+01:00Hi, I totally agree with your reader, it's har...Hi, I totally agree with your reader, it's hard to keep finding the 'jokes' funny and taking them in good humour when it becomes something you are defined by in your friendship group, i.e 'the gay one' - I'm a lesbian and in my group of friends I am the only one (apart from my girlfriend) but sometimes it's difficult to be 'the gay one' I wrote a post about it a while ago: http://helloantonia.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/isms.html<br /><br />most of the time the jokes don't bother me, because I know that they are just jokes, and the people I'm friends with are brilliant. but sometimes, it does get so tiresome to hear it!Antonia Lineshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02364253271241025896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-50651542156370540892012-06-01T15:01:11.007+01:002012-06-01T15:01:11.007+01:00As you mature, one moves away from being put in a ...As you mature, one moves away from being put in a defensive position with others that will never really be your friend anyway. Surround yourself with those that respect and honor you, give them the time that you would normally spend trying to be accepted and let the rest go by the wayside.Was Oncehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15787588883235992471noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-86437982701612792552012-06-01T14:25:04.101+01:002012-06-01T14:25:04.101+01:00It sounds likely that the close friends of your re...It sounds likely that the close friends of your reader don't appreciate the impact of their comments and behaviours. I agree with you GB regarding them getting these things out of their system to some degree, but the idea of making them understand how it feels by giving the same back to them can be worthwhile as it can quite readily, in my experience, make them take a different perspective. Similar to the <i>"When did you discover you were straight?"</i> question. <br /><br />But in the end it may be worthwhile letting his friends know directly that he doesn't appreciate the constant gay references, because they may well just not get it otherwise. If they then keep on making them then it's time to reconsider the friendships.Superchilledhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00480825797997399121noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10667700.post-69718011770361338102012-05-30T22:33:39.118+01:002012-05-30T22:33:39.118+01:00I think it's interesting how the reader states...I think it's interesting how the reader states he doesn't only want gay friends and girls - clearly sexuality is still an issue to him. Maybe it is this weakness that provokes the comments. If he wants guy friends why does he care if they're gay or straight?<br /><br />I agree with your recommendations GB. I think all openly gay people encounter the same problems from straight people (guys or girls). I am also quite tired of girls and some guys asking me dumb questions, e.g. "so is there like a guy and a girl? how do you know if someone's gay? OMG I have the perfect guy for you".<br /><br />It all just shows how new and intriguing to them it is on one hand, and also how they don't bother to educate themselves about it on the other. <br /><br />At the end of the day I think it's important to distinguish whether the reader's friends are well-intentioned or not. A lot of times it's a case of genuine faux-pas.<br /><br />The truth is that heteros will never really understand, no matter how open minded. <br /><br />So if this is a recurring situation, I suggest the reader rethinks these friendships. Or just move back to the UK!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com