Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Nightmare

"I just assumed it was because he's a Northern European guy," says boyfriend number 2, "because I once had another boyfriend from Northern Europe, and he didn't shower enough either."

"What?" say boyfriend number 1 and boyfriend number 3 together.

"Don't put me in the same category as GB!" says boyfriend number 1.

"Or me!" says boyfriend number 3.

"But you guys have a cold climate," explains boyfriend number 2, "so it's natural that you won't be used to taking as many showers as guys like me coming from a more humid climate."

"That's as maybe," replies boyfriend number 1, looking slightly indignant, "but I've been telling GB that he should wash more ever since I've known him!"

"Well somehow I think I've succeeded a bit," grins boyfriend number 2, "because whenever we've been on holiday together, I've made it clear that he can't get into bed with me at night unless he's had a shower first :-)."

"You know, the first time I met him," says boyfriend number 3, "I didn't think that he could have showered before he came to meet me. At the time he told me that he had taken a shower, although eventually when I got to know him better he admitted that he'd lied about that."

"And another thing," interrupts boyfriend number 1, "he's always online. He can't be cruising all the time, but I've got no idea what else he does! I guess I've been assuming that he's chatting to you guys?"

"Actually we used to chat on MSN," says boyfriend number 2, "but we got out of the habit of doing that, maybe a year ago. Now you mention it though, he's also online a lot when he's with me. Whenever we're away together, he definitely spends a lot more time online that I do."

"I think we should try and teach him a lesson somehow," says boyfriend number 3 darkly. "What about ... "

All of a sudden I wake up in a cold sweat. It's not time to get up yet, and boyfriend number 1 is sound asleep beside me, but I've just had the most terrible nightmare. Somehow, all my boyfriends had got together and they were discussing my faults :-(. Heaven help me if that ever actually happens!

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

i think that means, you need to shower more often! You don't want to get dumped over that.How embarrassing would that be? Shower everyday!

Superchilled said...

Ah that's just too funny.
Have any of them actually ever met each other?
Do they ever want to?
Will you ever sleep soundly again?
;)

GB said...

No trevor, they've never met each other as far as I know! So perhaps I'll have to just wash more to get a good night's sleep in future, LOL.

GB xxx

VM said...

I think it is a sign of worrying, when you think of something too much, it is why you dream of them when you sleep

Humming Bird in Hyde said...

I find it a very very funny dream. I couldn't stop laughing. haha.. :-)

Anonymous said...

So you are a not so shower friendly guy GB!?
You therefore, cultivate the idea we(rest of Europe)have about British guys

T said...

truly funny - often our worst fears, and a few home truths, are revealed in our nightmares !

Anonymous said...

ok, this WAS funny! hehehehe
(crossed fingers)

Guy In London said...

GB, that was your funniest post in weeks. Back to your old self! Now that you're off your soap box why not come along to the Bloggers Meet.

GIL

Anonymous said...

this perhaps could be suggesting some repressed concerns of having three boyfriends.

You have mentioned in some of your posts that perhaps bf 2 or was it 3 was secretly hoping for something more serious (and perhaps long term).

.....

GB said...

I wasn't aware that blogs had to be funny GIL?

It's boyfriend number 2 psychboy, the things he's said in the past have strongly implied that he'd like to be my boyfriend on an exclusive basis. But just because it's not an exclusive arrangement doesn't mean that it's not long term!

GB xxx

Gay Nairobi Man said...

So GB, You have upheld the stereotype we have here in Africa that English guys don't shower.

The Kenyan-Englishman is known as dirty and smelly.

Anonymous said...

I thought something was amiss when I started reading your post. I was laughing when I reached the end of it. Very nice story, GB :)

Dragonzlad

Anonymous said...

That IS funny! Not so funny about the showering part! You should always be fresh as a daisy!

GBD xxx

Anonymous said...

GB, I stand corrected...exclusivity is definetely the more appropriate word.

With BF1, you have lots of security (almost like the first or lead wife in a harem), but although long-term do you think you could maintain all 3 boyfriends in the long run?

GB said...

Probably not psychboy, we'll have to see what happens. GB xxx

H.S. Dharmendra said...

Three BFs, all thee in the same place, talking with each other, exchanging notes, conspiring against you - wow! What a nightmare.

Please clarify, you are a Gay Banker or a Guy Banker?