Sunday, November 18, 2007

House hunting with boyfriend number 1

Last month, I said that I might buy boyfriend number 1 a place to live, so that we no longer have to live together in the same house. But in terms of what kind of place to buy, or what area to look in, I've been leaving all the decisions to him.

Last week, after countless viewings, he told me that he's finally found a place that might be suitable.

"I think perhaps you should see it GB," he said to me, "and then you can tell me what you think :-)."

Of course, before we put in a bid to buy anywhere, I'll have to see it anyway. It's going to be my job to deal with the lawyers, even though it'll end up being owned by boyfriend number 1.

So a couple of days ago, we take a trip over to see a small freehold house in a nice area about a couple of miles from where we currently live. And after having looked at the house with the estate agent, we decide to have a stroll around the local area to see what shops and amenities there are. But as we walk around some of the neighbouring streets together, we're in for a pleasant surprise.

"GB is that you?" someone suddenly asks me from behind, "what on earth are you two doing wandering around in this area?"

Turning round, we're confronted by one half of a lesbian couple that we've both known for years.

"Really good to see you :-)," replies boyfriend number 1.

"I didn't know you lived around here," he continues. "In fact, we're just trying to get a feel for what this area would be like to live in."

"But why on earth are you two thinking of moving over here?" queries our female friend.

"Um, well," dithers boyfriend number 1, looking at me for help, "well actually we're probably going to go our separate ways ..."

"Oh my god ..." she replies, but boyfriend number 1 interrupts her.

"Don't worry," he says, smiling now and suddenly looking completely relaxed. "Everything's OK. And we've just seen a nice property near here, so I guess you and me might end up being neighbours :-)."

A short conversation follows about the area, and how nice it would be if boyfriend number 1 and this lesbian couple do become neighbours.

"Well keep in touch," says our friend she heads off towards her house, "and do let us know what happens."

Myself and boyfriend number 1 resume our stroll, and for a few seconds we don't say anything to each other.

"I can almost hear the hot keyboard at work," says boyfriend number 1 joking to me quietly, "she'll be emailing all our mutual friends, 'guess what I've just found out'!"

Indeed, the conversation with this friend was a major event and we both realised it. For the first time, boyfriend number 1 acknowledged that we might split up and he didn't seem to mind. He'd never said it before. And certainly not to a friend who's likely to start gossipping to all our other friends too.

I think all this is a very good sign that boyfriend number 1's mental health is recovering. He's finally coming to terms with the situation, getting used to the idea of living without me, and maybe even starting to look forward to a new life. Splitting up seems pretty certain now. But at least the way things are going, I hope that we'll be able to remain close friends.

15 comments:

ttonn said...

Good to know another man survives and live happily after a relationship end. GB you are really a caring man. I say this not because you buy your boyfriend number 1 a house, I say this because you gave him time to accept the true. Please allow me to say think you.

Adrian said...

hi gb, i know your dear gb queries are about relationships or personal development but my question is a skew from the usual topic. my question is about personal grooming. i know you probably think that this may sound like a queer eye for a queer guy show. :-P what is the right way method of shaving ones body hair (legs etc.)? do you shave your body or shaved any guys you have hooked-up? i dont know what to use? good old shaving, using naire or waxing? any advise?

Pete said...

Hi GB,

Just a very personal question: how do you feel about splitting up? You've been together for an awfully long time.

Monty said...

I've just read your last couple of posts GB...one quick question...if you and BF1 do split up and he will be living separately from you, will he still remain as BF1? Or will BF2 then upgrade to BF1 and BF3 become BF2? and then, if you've only got BF2 and BF3 left, will you want someone to fill BF3's place? If so, how does one apply for this position? LOL ;-)

GB said...

Thanks for your kind thoughts ttonn.

I don't really know much about hair trimming Adrian, although back in January I let boyfriend number 3 trim me downstairs! And when he did it, he used something like the gadget pictured in that post.

I should write a whole post to answer that question Pete. But for now, I reckon it'll probably be for the best as long as we can remain close friends.

LOL Monty, but there are other guys in my life apart from the ones that you mention! But perhaps I should expand the potential boyfriend pool a bit? I don't think I'll bother with application forms though, instead all applicants will get thorough interviews :-)!

GB xxx

SP said...

Hi GB hope everything goes well with your break-up, i'm going through one at the moment and the other half is not accepting it at all, does one minute but half an hour later thinking everything's fine in the world,

maybe i should give up on men all together!!!

Sir Wobin said...

Hope you're OK with everything GB. This is a big change and it's good to see you supporting bf1. Hope you have the support you need from the other lovely men in your life.

Anonymous said...

Assuming you do go your separate ways GB, do you think you will now tell BF number 1 about the blog? Is there a small devil on one shoulder urging a cathartic confession?

Matt

Monty said...

OK GB...will you be expanding your potential boyfriend pool to include the Antipodes??? *nudge nudge* I think I've been through a fairly thorough "interview" already...just not the kind of interview you're talking about! ;-)

GB said...

Give up men SP? In my experience, guys do have their uses LOL!

Thanks for the kind thoughts Sir Wobin. I am getting support of a kind from some of the other guy's that I'm close to. I say 'of a kind' because they seem to think that I'm not being firm enough with boyfriend number 1, given that I'm buying him somewhere to live. However, perhaps they're a bit biased!

No Anonymous Matt, whoever you really are. This blog is effectively my therapy, and I can honestly say that I feel absolutely no need to tell anyone about it, especially since I need this therapy given what's happening in my life at the moment.

Good idea Monty, there are lots of hot sounding guys down under. Perhaps you could introduce me so some of them, perhaps guys like Dating Guy, Single Guy, Christerbjorn, ... :-). Just teasing!

GB xxx

Monty said...

Hey GB...you don't need to meet those guys! You've already met the cream of the crop! LOL Christerbjorn (McDreamy) is already taken...but DG and SG are now available. BUT I'm first in the queue! LOL

GB said...

Awwww, thanks Monty, your implied affection means a lot to me :-). I guess this is where I have to say, I can't live up to your expectations, particularly at this distance LOL!

Love and kisses, GB xxx

Soul Seared Dreamer said...

Well all things considered.. its great you can move on so smoothly.

You really are a great guy GB.

Kinda like an end of an era though, huh?

Monty said...

GB, you already know that you've exceeded my expectations, but yes, at this distance, 'tis a little challenging! HOWEVER, we're just a short'ish flight (well, OK, maybe not but still...) away! ;-) All things considered, you always know that if you ever visit our fair shores again, you've got at least one friend here! (though I'm sure you've got plenty more) Hugs! x

michael said...

Wow-thats a shocker. Never expected that. Perhaps there was more of an undercurrent in the relationship that wasn't expressed in prior postings?

As a gay banker in a LTR in NY with "interests" on the side, I am eagerly anticipating your posting about it.

We learn so much from your shared experiences-thank you. As the first generation of gay men to live in a newly gay world, we've got a lot to learn. And sharing our stories is the first step.