Thursday, October 13, 2005

Relationship counselling to start next week

Things have been difficult with boyfriend number 1 ever since my holiday in Asia with boyfriend number 2. The first few weeks after I got back were the hardest (A conversation with boyfriend number 1, Things are still difficult with boyfriend number 1), but since then things have settled down. In general, we're getting on quite well with each other. But there are unresolved issues, and since August we've been waiting for a relationship counsellor to become available at a counselling centre which boyfriend number 1 found.

One morning about a week ago, as I’m leaving for work, he tells me that a counsellor has become available, and the first session will be one evening during the third week in October. He obviously doesn’t like talking about this subject, otherwise he would have mentioned it to me the previous night when I got home from the bank. Perhaps he's even known for a few days, and has been waiting for the best time to tell me.

Hopefully we’ll end up staying with each other, but on a more honest basis. After the situation which arose over the summer, which prompted me to go on holiday with boyfriend number 2 instead of boyfriend number 1 (Boyfriend Number 2 - Past the point of no return?), I reckon I need the freedom to meet other guys for fun. I’d also like to see boyfriend number 2 sometimes, although since he lives outside the UK that won’t be very often. I’ve been meeting other guys for years of course, but maybe that's part of the problem - I was never honest about this with boyfriend number 1.

On each occasion that I’ve met up with boyfriend number 2 I’m surprised that he doesn’t have a permanent boyfriend. He's such a lovely guy. That may be changing now though (News from boyfriend number 2), so even when we do meet in the future it may have to be on a friends-only basis.

I was chatting to L in Hong Kong on MSN a few days ago (Asia trip 2002: Tuesday evening in Hong Kong). I've always liked the idea of having boyfriends waiting for me in the cities I visit on business, and if boyfriend number 2 is my boyfriend in Singapore, L would be my boyfriend in Hong Kong. But I haven't been to Hong Kong since 2003. So apart from very infrequent e-mails, this is the first time I've communicated with him for over two years.

L: any chance u visit HK again?

GB: Not at the moment, sorry :-(

L: pity

L: so, do u still travel much? or not at all

GB: Well I was on holiday in Asia for almost 4 weeks in june/july, Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia

L: ic, ic, bet u had lots of fun there

GB: I was with a boyfriend from singapore

L: ok

L pauses.

L: u have bf everywhere?

GB: no of course not

Although, as I said above, the truth is that I wish I did!

GB: I live with my main bf in London, and now I've been on holiday with a bf from Singapore

GB: but the bf from Singapore is spending a lot of time in the USA at mom, I think he may get himself a permanent bf over there :-(

L: hmmm, lots to choose from in a caucasian country, he'll be like a kid in candy shop

I hadn't thought of it like that. Judging from some of the chats I've had with boyfriend number 2 in the last couple of months, I think L is probably right!

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