Saturday, July 22, 2006

The Man from (part 2/3)

[Read part 1/3]

"Never get your oats where you get your bread" is a polite way to say it. "Don't fuck the payroll" is somewhat coarser. But they both mean the same thing: Don't have sex with your work colleagues! As a gay man I've never really paid much attention to these sayings, because it seemed so unlikely that I'd ever be in a situation where a bit of fun is possible with a guy who works for the same bank as me.

In reality though there are ways that this could happen. For example, I could bump into a work colleague in a gay sauna. That did happen once of course, in the distant past! Or maybe more likely is discovering that a guy I meet from gaydar or just happens to work for the same bank as me. Or a guy from Fridae perhaps?

It's the second Sunday in June, and after communicating via mail messages I'm finally going to get to meet a lovely looking Asian guy who first contacted me on Fridae in late May. As usual, I do my run along the river with some guys from the gym I go to, and afterwards grab a taxi to the tube station where we've arranged to meet. I get there early so I send him a quick txt msg

GB: Hi I'm a bit early, I'm at the tube station already! See you soon, GB x

He had actually asked me to try and arrive early because he's got a barbecue to go to, so hopefully he'll be early too. Within a minute I've got a reply

guy: great, give me five minutes, x

As usual when I'm waiting to meet a guy that I've never met before, I start looking at all the men as they pass by wondering which one is going to be 'my guy'. After about five minutes I think I can see him in the distance. As he gets closer it looks more and more like the photos which I saw on Fridae. Indeed, he can see me looking at him and he walks straight up to me with a grin on his face.

"Hi", I say beaming a huge smile at him. He looks even better than he did in his photos.

"Been here long?" he asks casually, smiling back.

He's almost exactly the same height as me. For some reason that I've never been able to work out, I always find that really attractive in a guy. And this guy is exceptionally cute too!

"No, only about five minutes! So where shall we go?"

We head down the road towards an All Bar One, but it's not open yet so we settle for the Caffe Nero next door.

"Can I get you a coffee?" I ask once we're inside.

"Sure, can you get me a regular Latte?"

We've been chatting for about ten minutes now, just finding out a few things about each other. While we're queuing for coffee together, he tells me that his family is originally from Singapore,

"But I've been living here for ages now", he says. "Anyway, what about you? I know you've got a boyfriend! Where do you work?"

I tell him the name of the bank I work for. "And you?" I ask. But he simply repeats the name of the bank that I work for.

"Yes, that's where I work", I say laughing, "but I wondered where you work?"

"Well I work there too!" he says with a big smile on his face.

I can't believe it!

"You're kidding me", I say astonished, "really? You don't seem that surprised."

"Well in the mail messages you'd told me that you work for a bank, and what the nearest tube station to your office is, so I knew it was a possibility."

True, and the way the mail message conversation had gone I hadn't found out the recriprocal information, until now!

I pay for the coffees and we go and sit down and talk about the different teams that we work for in the bank. I can't help wondering whether fun with a guy from the same bank is a good idea. Still, we do work in very different areas, and he doesn't seem that bothered by the situation.

"Why don't we go and sit in the park", he says once we've finished the coffees.

"But don't you have a barbecue to go to?", I ask, in case he'd really rather go to that instead of being with me.

"I do, but I'd like to talk to you a bit more :-). I can be late anyway!"

Once in the park we just lie on the grass together and chat about the bank we work for, gay life in London, gay life in general, men, and anything that comes to mind. We seem to get on very well. He's bemused by my situation.

"No", he says at one point, "I reckon the guys you call boyfriend number 2 and boyfriend number 3 are really just fuck buddies!"

But I protest. And the posting on this subject last month was partly the result of this conversation.

"I've had long term relationships before", he says later, "and I've got a couple of fuck buddies, but they're not boyfriends! I'm still looking for a bf, and I'll stop seeing the fb's if I get a bf :-)"

It also turns out that he's just starting to see one guy who could potentially become a boyfriend.

"But he lives in Paris at the moment. He's prepared to re-locate to London to be with me, but that's a big step for him to take. For the moment we're just taking it one step at a time".

Eventually he needs to get to his barbecue, so we walk back to the tube station together. On the way, we chat about whether we'll meet up again.

"Well I'd like to, um, get to know you better", I say, looking him in the eye with a cheeky grin on my face.

"Yes", he laughs, "I think I'd like to get you know you better too!"

As I'm going to be getting a taxi, we pause outside the tube station to say goodbye to each other, and he gives me a peck on the lips. Great! That's certainly a step in the right direction, because I really want to investigate the contents of this guy's pants!!

"Lets do lunch next week", he says.

"Sure, I'll send you a txt msg with my full name and then you can send me an e-mail from your workstation tomorrow and we can arrange it".

We part on very good terms. As I said in the previous posting, I feel I'm kind of dating this guy rather than cruising him. And I'm enjoying it :-). After all, even at my tender young age, I've probably done more than enough cruising to last a lifetime!

[to be continued]


Anonymous said...

The charms of meeting someone new, learning about them, the possibility of garnering a new perspective...

Talking whilst laying in the grass, looking them deeply in the eyes.

It's a lovely feeling, isn't it?!

Anonymous said...

Seems like a dream to me. A dream that is not be mine ever. Congrats to you!

Anonymous said...

Yeah GB your whole experience seems very DREAMY to me too.

And lying on the grass chatting with a cute asian gay guy under the must be the most "decent" thing you've done in your past crusing experiences :D

btw im planning a visit to UK in early Sept, anyone knows any interesting events/functions during that period?

Anonymous said...

my best friend is gay and it seems like he never lets me in on what really goes on with him and his "guy". but now i feel like i know you from the stories you are telling, and you reel me in! :) i have a liking for gay men, mainly because they seem to be open about their emotions...i'm alyssa by the way...a straight girl from California who is very open minded about homosexuality to say the least...keep writing and entertaining me with your conversations with men! take care! :)

Anonymous said...

Do it.. if you think he has the emotional maturity to handle it. My experience with guys from work has been a lot coarser...and dirtier.

GB said...

Yeah it's felt a bit like a dream too, but I had no idea that it would come across like that in the way I wrote it :-)

It was you that asked about gay cruising in London wasn't it Josh! Consult Time Out (and buy a copy of the mag when you arrive), there's also

GB xxx