My gorgeous Japanese masseur

I've been seeing B, my Japanese masseur, about once a week since I first met him last September. I confess though that there's been a bit of slippage in terms of what we get up to with each other when I visit for massage!

Originally I would either visit for massage, or for other activities, and the two were separate because neither of us want to feel that there's a 'sex-for-money' situation between us. But on the third visit for massage, I could tell B was feeling a bit frisky.

He finishes the massage and leaves the room for a short while, leaving me to relax on his futon. I always go naked for massage, and I'm about to get up and put my clothes back on when he comes back into the room. He looks me in the eye, and I reciprocate, smiling lovingly at him. He hesitates, but not for long, and the next thing I know he's lying next to me :-).

"Shhhh", he says, grinning. He'd told me when we first met that he doesn't want his colleague to hear anything that would imply activities rather than massage. I don't have a problem with that of course, and although the walls are quite thin, he had closed the door when he came back in so nature takes it course!

The next week, the same things happens. After the massage, he comes and lies down beside me, so I put my arm round him and kiss him on the lips.

"Naughty boy!" he says, grinning again. But it's clear that he wants me to be a naughty boy :-).

Afterwards he asks, "I get to know you like this before massage, right?"

"Yes, but it's really nice being able to play like this after a massage", I say to him, "it's OK isn't it?"

"Well", he says with a guilty tone in his voice, "not really". But he's laughing!

Because I like B, I don't want to put him in a difficult situation with his colleague, so I decide to vary the format the following week. I opt for a 30 minute massage, followed by a speciality herbal bath. That way, I won't be lying naked in front of him at the end of the massage session. Everything goes according to plan and after the bath, I go back into the massage room to put my clothes back on.

B watches me, and sees that I'm about to put my undershorts back on. But he looks slightly upset. Oh dear, I don't want him to be upset. So I walk over to him and give him a hug and a peck on the lips. But he looks longingly into my eyes. I look longingly into his eyes. So we kiss again. Somehow, I don't think my plan to plan to avoid activities is working!

"You romantic guy", says B afterwards, as we cuddle up to each other on his futon.

When I first met him, it's true that I was suspicious of whether he was just hooking me as a massage client by letting me have a bit of fun with him. More than anything else, the situation after the herbal bath proved to me that B is completely genuine.

The fact that B was eager for fun after I'd had the herbal bath eases my own guilt about the situation. So the next week, it's back to an hour of massage.

"If you like, I cook Japanese food for you one evening", says B as I'm getting undressed at the start of the session.

"That would be very nice", I say smiling at him, "but I almost always eat supper in the evening with my boyfriend".

"OK", says B thinking, "no problem". But he looks slightly rejected, even though he's known from the start that I live with boyfriend number 1.

"I got nice Japanese scarfs here", he says at the end of the visit, "you want one?"

Oh dear, boyfriend number 1 knows that I meet other guys, but he doesn't want me to be obvious about it. And taking a scarf home would be very obvious to him.

"Awww, that's very kind B", I say putting my arm around him, "but actually I've got loads of scarfs so I doubt that I'd use it".

Again, B looks slightly upset.

I feel that I'm getting a bit lost here. It's clear that B likes me, and I like him enormously too. And because I like him, I don't want to mislead him, or for him to be upset. Somehow I feel less connection to him than to boyfriends 1, 2 and 3. Perhaps it's because I sometimes find communication a bit difficult, because English isn't his first language. None the less, he may well be in the process of becoming boyfriend number 4.