Sunday, July 30, 2006

A lazy session with an American guy in London

On the last Sunday of June, I posted a story about a session I had with a French guy on the last Sunday in May. Although I usually go running along the river with some guys from the gym on Sunday mornings, the session with the French guy caused me to miss the run that day. And since I posted the story on a Sunday, Legal-ize-IT left a comment wondering whether I did the run on the day that I posted the story. As it turned out, I found something better to do!

After posting the story about the French guy, I'm poking around gaydar as usual when I spot a guy that I've chatted to once before. I recall that he said he lives quite close to me, so I decide to start chatting to him again. Because we’d chatted before, it doesn’t take long to work out that he'd like me to visit him, and that 'now' is convenient. If it’s a quick session I should still be able to get to the gym in time for the run, so stuffing some clean gym kit into my sports bag I head off.

When I get to where the guy lives, it turns out to be a closed butcher’s shop. No doubt he lives above the shop, but there doesn’t seem to be any way in. I’ve just worked out that the entrance is in a side road when the guy calls me on my mobile phone.

“So when you get to the address”, he says slowly, “carry on past the shop and take the first turning on the left”. He's got a deep-south American accent, which I hadn't expected at all.

“Actually I’d just worked that out!” I say proudly. I ring the doorbell, and although I can’t hear it from where I’m standing, I hear it at the other end of the phone.

“Clever boy!” says the guy, “I’ll be right down”.

Soon I’m in a staircase, following the guy up some steps which lead to an open air terrace on the first floor. Face to face he’s a very friendly looking guy, but quite pale skinned. Although he’s got light brown hair, I can’t help wondering whether he’s ginger downstairs like several other pale skinned guys that I’ve known in the past.

The first floor terrace has several solid doors facing onto it. “Follow me”, he says, “I’ve got the apartment at the end”.

Once inside the apartment, he shows me into the main room. Most of the room is taken up by a huge sofa-bed, which has been opened out and made up into a comfy looking double bed. Somehow I have the impression that the sofa-bed is always open like that. At the foot of the bed I see a computer that’s still logged into gaydar. Half way up one side of the bed there’s a table, and on the table there's a TV showing some porn.

“Can I get you”, he asks, smiling at me, “anything?” I hadn’t noticed at first, but everything the guy says or does has a kind of slow, dreamy quality about it. It’s as though the matrix hasn’t properly connected this guy into reality!

A glass of water would be great”, I say gratefully.

“OK”, he says, and he pauses. “Just hang on here a minute.” And after another pause he wanders off to find the kitchen.

While he’s gone I sit on the sofa-bed and take my trainers off. Thinking about the situation, I decide that the guy must be high on something. But I can’t smell any dope, and I can’t see any alcohol around, so exactly what drugs he’s been doing is a mystery. By the time the guy’s back in the room I’m naked, apart from my gym shorts.

“Thanks, that’s great”, I say before gulping down a few mouthfulls of water.

Before too long we’re both on the sofa-bed getting to know each other a bit better.

“Do you like being cuddled”, I ask half way through.

“Sure”, and he pauses, “I do.”

I manoeuvre him onto his side facing the TV, which still has some porn showing on it, and wrapping my arms round him from behind I snuggle up so that I can see the porn too. He feels lovely lying in my arms, but a few minute later he seems to be snoring. But we haven’t finished yet, I didn’t think I was that boring!

To amuse myself while he’s asleep, I reach down and feel his tackle. Since we started cuddling it’s definitely softened, but as I start to play with him I feel it slowly harden again inside my grip. Actually I quite enjoy touching guys in their sleep like this, it’s as though I’m doing something very naughty without the guy's permission. After a few minutes I lift myself up a bit to get a good look and my previous suspicions are confirmed, there's a small ginger forest down there!

After about ten minutes the guy starts waking up, and doesn’t even seem to realise that he’s been asleep. Re-engaging with each other now, we finish the job that we started. At the finale, I’m treated to a magnificent fountain, much more vigorous than a shaken bottle of Louis Roederer’s Cristal could ever be!

“Judging by your accent I guess you’re from one of the Southern States”, I say to him afterwards, cuddling up to him again.

“Yeah, I’m from”, he says, thinking carefully, “Alabama.”

We chat a bit, but suddenly I wonder, “Any idea what the time is mate?”

Damm! I’ve missed the run with my gym buddies. Ahhh well, never mind, there’s always next week :-).

Soon it seems like time to leave so I make my excuses and head to the gym anyway. On my way, I can't help wondering how long the jokes about ginger guys have been around. There was even a south park episode about gingervitis. Somewhere, at some point, some ginger guys must have done something incredibly stupid in the last twenty years or so to justify all this attention, becauseI don't remember ginger being an issue when I was at school.

Friday, July 28, 2006

The Man from (epilogue)

[Read part 1/3, part 2/3, part 3/3]

During the first meeting with The Man from, he had told me about a guy he was starting to see who might potentially become a full time boyfriend. I could only be a part-time boyfriend for him of course. In the days that followed the fun we had, when we almost got caught In flagrante delicto, it gradually became clear to both of us that for his relationship with this other guy to stand any chance of working we wouldn't be able to continue seeing each other :-(.

I do feel a bit heart-broken *sob*. In my mind, I'd already pencilled this guy in as boyfriend number 4. I've said before that I'm keen on polyamory, but I guess this is one of the downsides. Having found a small place for him in my heart, it hurts now that he can't occupy it :-(((

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

How can I become a father?

I've always wanted to be a dad. But there's a bit of a problem. None of my boyfriends have the necessary equipment :-(

I like to think that I'd be a good father. I'm a very caring and loving guy. Hopefully that comes through in the some of the stories I post. And I think I've been a good uncle to my sister's children too.

I also think I'd be a good sperm donor. It can't be that easy to find guys like me who are intelligent, with a PhD in fact, and from a family with an excellent genetic profile as well. For example, to my knowledge no one in my family has died of cancer or heart disease. As a reasonably successful guy, travelling to donate wouldn't be a problem either.

Perhaps there are some relevant web sites somewhere? Anyway, if any readers can e-mail me some advice, or leave a comment, I'd be very grateful.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

The Man from (part 3/3)

[Read part 1/3, part 2/3]

The day after I met The Man from for a coffee, I arrive at work hoping that he’ll send me an e-mail at some point during the day. Having told him my full name he should easily be able to find me in the work e-mail system.

I don’t have long to wait. Around 9:30am I get a simple e-mail from him suggesting that we have lunch together nearby. So as not to seem over-keen I wait ten minutes or so before accepting. We agree to meet at 12:30pm.

At lunch, we pick up the conversation pretty much where we left off the previous day. It turns out that the barbecue he went to after meeting me was a rather alcoholic affair, and he’s slightly hung over. But we continue to get on well so when I get back to my desk after lunch I send him an e-mail with a rather important question:

Do you think it might ever be possible to spend some time with each other at your place? Or is it too difficult to co-ordinate at the moment because you need to avoid your flatmate?

Before too long I get the reply:

Yes, I'm confident that we'll get to spend time together at my place. I'll just have to be tactful as to the timing of it. It will most likely be next week [mid week] if you can wait out till then. BTW, did I tell you I think you're rather cute [and good looking?] *blush*

How sweet, he likes me :-))))))). I’ve certainly never had an e-mail like that through the work e-mail system! I have to reciprocate:

You didn't say! And I can certainly return the compliment (*blushing too*)

In the days that follow, we exchange loads of little e-mails with each other. “Off to see boyfriend number 3 at lunchtime today”, I confide in him on one occasion. “Did you see that programme on TV last night?” he asks me one morning. “Did you win your squash game last night?” I ask him on another occasion. And so on. We also meet up one evening for a couple of drinks after work, and the following week we have lunch together again.

But mid-week of the following week arrives and no invitation to his place materialises. Has he forgotten what he said the previous week? If he does want to hook-up for fun then why isn't he suggesting possible times? Surely he doesn't expect me to be instantly available at any time of his choosing?

Mid-morning on the Wednesday, after an e-mail about what he'll be doing that evening, I'm starting to feel a bit upset about the situation. I just have to know where I stand. I decide to forward to him the e-mail that he sent me the previous week in which he told me that mid-week this week should be possible. His immediate e-mail reply simply says "don't be like that.... ". I don't care though. If he's just going to be a cock-tease, the friendship isn't going to work from my point of view.

But after a few more e-mails we're back on track. His diary is very full, just like when we were originally planning to meet for the first time, but he says he'll try and re-arrange something so that we can spend some quality time together.

The following day we meet up for coffee late morning. His flatmate will be away now until the following Monday. We go through all the possibilities, but it seems that whenever he's free I'm busy, and vice-versa. Damm! Suddenly I have an idea

"Well what about tonight", I suggest, "if we both finish work a bit early, we could have some time together before your squash game couldn't we?"

He's not sure at first but after a bit more thought he agrees.

All afternoon I’m looking forward to getting to know him properly. Late afternoon we exchange e-mails to confirm the meeting time. At the appointed hour, we meet up outside the bank as planned and soon we're in a taxi together on the way to his place.

He seems a bit nervous. “Are you OK?” I ask him.

"Yes I’m fine”, he says, although he doesn’t sound convincing.

He’s looking out of the cab window so I nudge my hand up to his, which is just resting on the seat between us. When he looks round I beam a huge friendly smile at him, and he breaks into a grin.

“It’s just that I don't do this as casually as you do, you know!”

“What on earth do you mean?” I joke with him, “Surely you don't think I'm a slut!”

“Oh, and you know the squash game that I've got later”, he says, relaxing a bit. “The friend that I'm playing will be dropping round at about 7pm so we’ll need to be presentable by then!”

I look at my watch and it’s only 5.30pm. “No problem, actually I should really be gone before then anyway!”

We reach his place after about fifteen minutes. It turns out that he lives on the top floor of a smart apartment block.

“I guess you could call it a penthouse”, he says with a grin as we go up in the lift, “but we’re only renting it”.

Leaving our shoes just inside the front door he shows me around. It’s a nice apartment, although it’s not all that big. But it’s got some great views of London over the nearby rooftops. We go into his bedroom and while he’s sorting out a couple of things I start stripping off. By the time he looks up I’ve got my shirt and tie off. I look him up and down, smiling at him as I sit down on the bed to take my socks off.

"All this seems so clinical", he says with a slight disapproving tone in his voice.

Ignoring him, and with my trousers still on, I stand up and kiss him gently on the lips. He smiles and reciprocates. All of a sudden he doesn’t seem so disapproving! I help him off with his shirt and we lie down on the bed with our trousers still on. But they don’t remain on for long! We have a wonderful time together.

“Mmmmm, I think I’ll definitely want to see you more than once a month”, he says afterwards with a happy, satisfied tone in his voice now. I know what he's referring to because a few days previously I’d told him that I only tend to hook up with boyfriend number 3 'about once a month'.

“Sounds good to me”, I say lazily. “Anyway, do you like being cuddled?”

We're still lying on the bed with each other, so now I move to lie behind him and wrap my arms round him tightly, and with our heads on the pillows we both look out through the huge floor to ceiling windows at the panoramic view. We lie there for a while dozing, both feeling very relaxed. Soon I can tell that he’s fallen asleep my arms. I love it when a guy feels relaxed enough with me to fall asleep. Raising my head slightly I admire the view, the gorgeous naked guy in my arms, and the view over London in front of us.

Zzzzz ……..

BUZZ-BUZZ - all of a sudden there’s a loud buzzing sound. We both wake up instantly.

“What’s that?” I ask sleepily.

“Oh no”, he says looking at the clock, “my friend must be early! Damm him, it’s still only 6:30pm.”

The buzzing sound goes again, and then a mobile phone rings.

“He’s trying to contact me! Why did we fall asleep?”

Suddenly we’re rushing round the apartment trying to make ourselves decent. Still trying to put my shirt on, I rush to retrieve my shoes from just inside the front door.

“At least he can’t get into the building”, I say, “so if I can get dressed quickly, I’ll slip out and if he sees me in the hallway he won’t know who I am.”

But before we can implement my plan there’s someone knocking at the door. Now we’re really stuffed! He’s obviously got in to the building as someone else was leaving, and now my only exit route is blocked :-(.

Without any time to think, we decide that I should hide in the bedroom. There’s a tiny area to stand inside the wardrobe so it seems like the obvious place.

“Just stay here behind the wardrobe door and I’ll try and get rid of him!”

But they're meant to be playing squash together so I can't see that working.

Inside the wardrobe I carry on getting dressed as best I can. But suddenly I find the whole situation hilarious! I’ve never been caught 'in flagrante delicto' before. Help - if I burst out laughing I’ll give the game away completely! In the distance I can hear the unwelcome visitor being let in.

“Sorry, I was in the bathroom”, I can hear my guy saying.

Soon my guy is coming into his bedroom, still carrying on a conversation with the visitor. He opens the wardrobe door and searches for his squash kit.

“…. but I never thought he’d stay with that one, he’s too much of a muscle mary …”

He looks at me while the door is open and he can tell that I’m finding the situation intensely funny. He glares at me, but smiling too, and I know that I have to behave!

Urgently I try to think back to when we entered the apartment. Does the front door have deadlock on it? If so, I pray that my guy doesn’t have to leave the apartment and use the deadlock because I’ll be completely trapped. Although boyfriend number 1 knows that I see other guys, he wouldn’t be very amused to hear me explain that I’m four hours late getting home because I was trapped in another guy’s apartment! But after a few more minutes the wardrobe door opens again. The visitor is still talking in the background.

“Right”, he whispers, “I’m going to leave with him, but as soon as I get outside the building I’m going to pretend that I’ve left something behind so that I’ll be able to come back for you.”

What a Brilliant idea! Superb!! Why didn’t I think of that?

“… so who’s he seeing now …”, he says in a much louder voice to the visitor.

I nod, and blow him a couple of air-kisses, and the plan goes into action. After about five minutes I think I hear them leave, so I gingerly step out of the wardrobe. Yes, no sound of talking, I think I’m safe.

Quickly I finish searching for my tie, and by the time my guy is re-entering the apartment I’m waiting for him in the hallway, completely dressed and respectable.

“Oh dear, what a mess!” he says smiling at me.

“But would it be so bad if your friend found out about me?” I ask curiously.

“It’s just that I don’t want to get a reputation as a flirt amongst my friends”, he explains. Fair enough I guess.

We leave the apartment together now, and I wait for a couple of minutes on the top floor to give them time to get safely away. If all my encounters with this guy are going to be as dreamy and as fun-filled as the one I’ve just had then I’m going to enjoy my friendship with him enormously!

Saturday, July 22, 2006

The Man from (part 2/3)

[Read part 1/3]

"Never get your oats where you get your bread" is a polite way to say it. "Don't fuck the payroll" is somewhat coarser. But they both mean the same thing: Don't have sex with your work colleagues! As a gay man I've never really paid much attention to these sayings, because it seemed so unlikely that I'd ever be in a situation where a bit of fun is possible with a guy who works for the same bank as me.

In reality though there are ways that this could happen. For example, I could bump into a work colleague in a gay sauna. That did happen once of course, in the distant past! Or maybe more likely is discovering that a guy I meet from gaydar or just happens to work for the same bank as me. Or a guy from Fridae perhaps?

It's the second Sunday in June, and after communicating via mail messages I'm finally going to get to meet a lovely looking Asian guy who first contacted me on Fridae in late May. As usual, I do my run along the river with some guys from the gym I go to, and afterwards grab a taxi to the tube station where we've arranged to meet. I get there early so I send him a quick txt msg

GB: Hi I'm a bit early, I'm at the tube station already! See you soon, GB x

He had actually asked me to try and arrive early because he's got a barbecue to go to, so hopefully he'll be early too. Within a minute I've got a reply

guy: great, give me five minutes, x

As usual when I'm waiting to meet a guy that I've never met before, I start looking at all the men as they pass by wondering which one is going to be 'my guy'. After about five minutes I think I can see him in the distance. As he gets closer it looks more and more like the photos which I saw on Fridae. Indeed, he can see me looking at him and he walks straight up to me with a grin on his face.

"Hi", I say beaming a huge smile at him. He looks even better than he did in his photos.

"Been here long?" he asks casually, smiling back.

He's almost exactly the same height as me. For some reason that I've never been able to work out, I always find that really attractive in a guy. And this guy is exceptionally cute too!

"No, only about five minutes! So where shall we go?"

We head down the road towards an All Bar One, but it's not open yet so we settle for the Caffe Nero next door.

"Can I get you a coffee?" I ask once we're inside.

"Sure, can you get me a regular Latte?"

We've been chatting for about ten minutes now, just finding out a few things about each other. While we're queuing for coffee together, he tells me that his family is originally from Singapore,

"But I've been living here for ages now", he says. "Anyway, what about you? I know you've got a boyfriend! Where do you work?"

I tell him the name of the bank I work for. "And you?" I ask. But he simply repeats the name of the bank that I work for.

"Yes, that's where I work", I say laughing, "but I wondered where you work?"

"Well I work there too!" he says with a big smile on his face.

I can't believe it!

"You're kidding me", I say astonished, "really? You don't seem that surprised."

"Well in the mail messages you'd told me that you work for a bank, and what the nearest tube station to your office is, so I knew it was a possibility."

True, and the way the mail message conversation had gone I hadn't found out the recriprocal information, until now!

I pay for the coffees and we go and sit down and talk about the different teams that we work for in the bank. I can't help wondering whether fun with a guy from the same bank is a good idea. Still, we do work in very different areas, and he doesn't seem that bothered by the situation.

"Why don't we go and sit in the park", he says once we've finished the coffees.

"But don't you have a barbecue to go to?", I ask, in case he'd really rather go to that instead of being with me.

"I do, but I'd like to talk to you a bit more :-). I can be late anyway!"

Once in the park we just lie on the grass together and chat about the bank we work for, gay life in London, gay life in general, men, and anything that comes to mind. We seem to get on very well. He's bemused by my situation.

"No", he says at one point, "I reckon the guys you call boyfriend number 2 and boyfriend number 3 are really just fuck buddies!"

But I protest. And the posting on this subject last month was partly the result of this conversation.

"I've had long term relationships before", he says later, "and I've got a couple of fuck buddies, but they're not boyfriends! I'm still looking for a bf, and I'll stop seeing the fb's if I get a bf :-)"

It also turns out that he's just starting to see one guy who could potentially become a boyfriend.

"But he lives in Paris at the moment. He's prepared to re-locate to London to be with me, but that's a big step for him to take. For the moment we're just taking it one step at a time".

Eventually he needs to get to his barbecue, so we walk back to the tube station together. On the way, we chat about whether we'll meet up again.

"Well I'd like to, um, get to know you better", I say, looking him in the eye with a cheeky grin on my face.

"Yes", he laughs, "I think I'd like to get you know you better too!"

As I'm going to be getting a taxi, we pause outside the tube station to say goodbye to each other, and he gives me a peck on the lips. Great! That's certainly a step in the right direction, because I really want to investigate the contents of this guy's pants!!

"Lets do lunch next week", he says.

"Sure, I'll send you a txt msg with my full name and then you can send me an e-mail from your workstation tomorrow and we can arrange it".

We part on very good terms. As I said in the previous posting, I feel I'm kind of dating this guy rather than cruising him. And I'm enjoying it :-). After all, even at my tender young age, I've probably done more than enough cruising to last a lifetime!

[to be continued]

Thursday, July 20, 2006

The Man from (part 1/3)

In the past I've always ignored Fridae because most of the users seem to live in Asia whereas I live in London. But the long (pointless!) conversation I had with a guy who originally found me on Fridae made me realise that some of the users live here in the UK. So last April I decided to see whether it’s possible to find guys for fun in London using Fridae.

I’ve mentioned before that Fridae has the rather cute concept of hearts. If you find a guy attractive you send him a heart, just to let him know that you've seen his profile and might perhaps be interested in him. The fact that everyone can see how many hearts you've been sent though has led to what boyfriend number 2 calls the heart tarts. These are the guys who just send you a heart in the hope that you'll send one back and increase their heart count! But hopefully they're in the minority. Anyway, most of the guys who've sent me hearts since I've had a Fridae profile look like lovely guys, so I decide to follow up all hearts I get sent by guys who live in London.

Sometime in May my first opportunity arises when a nice looking Asian guy who lives in London sends me a heart. Fridae is more relationship oriented than the gaydar/ meat markets, so to avoid any misunderstanding I send him a mail message which makes it clear that I'm only really interested in fun

Hi mate, thanks for the heart :-). I’m not sure what you’re looking for but I generally only use fridae to find no-strings fun with other guys. It looks like you live in London, as do I, so if you can accom I’d be interested to visit you sometime? GB xxx

And then I have to wait of course. For a guy who's used to the immediate nature of chatting on gaydar and it seems like an awfully slow way to communicate! But after a day or two I get a nice reply

Hi GB, Thanks for the message. I live in Central London and can accommodate. Do you have a face pic you can send me and what is your situation? Married or have boy friend? I can be discreet if required. It would be nice to meet and we can take it from there. R

Wow, how can he tell that I’ve got a partner? Perhaps the "no-strings fun" is a give away, coupled with the fact that I don't have a face pic on my profile? Anyway, it's a positive mail message so I tell him where to find my face pics.

Hi R, actually I do have a boyfriend so your discretion is appreciated! You can find my pics on the web at http://xxxxxxxxxxxxxx, hope we can meet sometime, GB xx

Again, after a day or two I get a reply

Hi GB, thanks for your pics. They look good. It would be nice to meet sometime. When are you free to meet for a drink and chat. I suppose after that, we can take it from there. I work and live quite centrally so happy to meet for a drink if you’re still interested. Let me know. R

And so it goes on. It seems that’s he’s quite a busy guy, and it turns out to be difficult to find a time when we’re both free! After a few more mail messages, I have a suggestion

Hi again R, I’ll be free early Sunday afternoon if that’s any use? I usually go for a run late morning with some guys from the gym I go to, but I’ll be free afterwards? Hope to meet you soon, GB xxx

Luckily it turns out that he can just about squeeze me into his diary!

Where is your gym? Is it around town? I have a bbq to attend around 2pm Sunday [but i can turn up a tad late] , so might be able to meet quickly after your run. i don't have a place though as my flatmate will be in, but will be nice to meet for a drink and chat, and maybe go somewhere if all goes well. R

So I send him a positive reply, and after a couple more mail messages we’ve exchanged mobile phone numbers and everything is sorted.

The style of hooking up with guys on fridae seems very different to the instant satisfaction that’s possible with gaydar and It’s taken about two weeks to set up this meeting. Although I like the sound of “and maybe go somewhere if all goes well”, if we can’t go back to his place, and given that he’s got a barbecue to go to, I guess it won’t be on the first meeting. The whole experience is far more like dating than cruising, which actually is quite refreshing.

Anyway, he looks great on his profile, I'll be in a good mood after my run, so back in June I could hardly wait for the following Sunday afternoon to arrive.

[to be continued]

Monday, July 17, 2006

Gay Banker interviews Will of DesignerBlog

I've interviewed quite a few fellow bloggers now, all gay men apart from the last one who was a teenage woman called Saf. But now there's only one more interview to do. The last interview victim is Will of DesignerBlog, who requested the interview in a comment to one of my postings last month.

Will of DesignerBlogWill is a 61 year old guy who lives in Boston in the USA. He came out as gay when he was about 35, but didn't meet his long term partner Fritz until he was in his early fifties. Judging by what he writes in his blog though, they're a perfect match for each other. Professionally, he's been working at MIT for over 30 years, as a theatrical designer, teacher and arts administrator.

To help me write pertinent interview questions I try and read the interviewee's blog including all the archives, but in Will's case I admit that this hasn't been possible. He started blogging almost three years ago in August 2003 and there's a huge amount to read. Luckily he did the standard blogger meme and posted 100 things about himself, so that helped enormously. Rummaging around in his archives I also found the answers to 30 adult questions which were very interesting too!

So Will, here are my interview questions:

  1. You've mention a couple of times (1, 2) that being gay saved you. So what do you think would have happened to you if it hadn't been possible to come out as gay, e.g. if you'd been born 50 years earlier perhaps, or if you lived today in much less tolerant country?

  2. In the parts of your blog that I've read you talk a lot about your life, politics and gay issues. But I haven't found anything about your love of theatre, which I assume from your job that you must have! So what's your favourite play that's been written during your lifetime, and what's your favourite play that was written before you were born?

  3. According to the 100 things, you were married for ten years, so you've obviously had heterosexual sexual experiences! My readers always expect a bit of adult content to my interviews so can you give us a paragraph or two comparing your experiences of straight sex to gay sex?

  4. You also mention in the 100 things that you came out as gay around the same time you accepted that you are an atheist. But I've not read anything else in your blog about how you came out. So can you tell us your full coming out story?

  5. Imagine: you can be transported back in time to witness one historical event of your choice. Which historical event do you choose and why?

I got an e-mail from Will yesterday to say that he's going to be on holiday with his partner Fritz for the next two weeks, so it may be a while before we get the answers. Anyway, that's the last interview that I'll be doing for the foreseeable future. Interviewing other bloggers by blog has been good fun :-), so hopefully some of the bloggers that I've interviewed will be keeping this interview meme alive!

Update [1-Aug-2006]: Having returned from holiday, Will has posted some excellent answers! Enjoy :-)

Friday, July 14, 2006

A repeat performance with a Chinese guy

Although I enjoy meeting new guys for fun, there's also something nice about hooking up with guys for repeat performances, assuming that the first meeting was enjoyable of course. There's the certainty that you know what they look like, and that they’re genuine. Sorting out the mechanics of who’s going to do what to whom is also much easier a second time round!

On the Saturday just after the middle of last month, I spot a guy online that I met once before. It’s the cute Chinese guy with the cock that went BOING! We had a good time together back in April so I decide to start chatting to him again:

GB: Hi m8, I'd luv to have another session with u sometime :-)
guy: sure
GB: :-), I could visit u now if ur up for it?
guy: cool. hehehe.

I always think it's cute the way some guys giggle (saying e.g. "hehehe") when the prospect of a bit of fun materialises! We chat briefly about the mechanics and everything is agreed very quickly. Although there are some soccer World Cup games on today, England aren't playing so taxi transport should be readily available.

GB: shall I visit you now then?
guy: ok
GB: give me 30 mins or so :-), I'll grab a cab like last time
guy: sure. sooner the better
GB: and send u a txt when I'm in the cab :-)
guy: cool
GB: send me a txt msg if there's any problem, see you soon :-)
guy: btw, i love cum twice OK?
GB: LOL yes I remember
guy: see u

Everything goes according to plan, and soon he’s buzzing me into his apartment. Once inside he asks me not to make too much noise, just like last time.

“The other people who live here are very nice, and they don’t judge. So I just think it would be a bit rude of me to let them hear, errr, orgasmic noises!” he laughs.

OK mate, well I’ll try my best to be quiet but I'm not promising! Gradually we strip off and start enjoying each other’s company.

While we're playing together though, I sometimes don't quite understand what he's saying to me. He speaks good English, but occasionally he'll only say a few words and expect me to work out the rest, and sometimes I don't. He's a lovely guy, but in terms of categorising him as a fuckbuddy or a boyfriend, he's definitely a fuckbuddy and not a boyfriend!

We take it slowly, and in spite of some minor communication problems we have a great time. And just like last time it ends up being a double cum session.

"How's your bank job", I ask him afterwards.

"Originally my new job seemed better than the old one", he says, "but now I'm not so sure."

"How come?"

"In the old job I felt excluded because I was working at an Arabic bank, and they often seemed to speak Arabic to each other which I didn't understand. I work for an Indian bank now, and sometimes I'm in the same situation, except that they're talking Hindi to each other instead of Arabic!"

Eventually it seems like time to go. "I'd better be off", I say, "and I think after all that activity I'd better head to the gym for a shower".

"Actually I think I'll go to my gym too", he says, "but for a workout!"

"I did my workout this morning :-). Anyway, you mean that all the exercise I gave you just now wasn't enough?"

We laugh, and I get him to phone a mini-cab for me. We share a can of coke while we wait for the cab to arrive, and when it comes, we leave together and go our separate directions. Although communicating with him was sometimes a minor problem, it's never going to be a major issue when there are two guys who are fundamentally after the same thing!

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Here is The City

So recently I was contacted by a London based business and financial news website And now they've quoted me on a news article that they've put out about gay and lesbian City workers :-)


Tuesday, July 11, 2006

A quick session on Saturday morning

If I've got nothing better to do, I'll do a spin class in the gym on Saturday morning as part of my exercise regime. Spin is a popular class so I have to book, which I'll usually do a few days in advance. The only problem is that sometimes I'll end up arranging more interesting activities, and then I become unpopular with the gym staff if I forget to cancel my booking!

Alternative activities do seem to present themselves to me on Saturday morning. For example, on the first Saturday of last month, I'm logged into gaydar while eating my breakfast. I spot a guy online who I've chatted to a few times before, although we've never met. But from the previous conversations I know that he lives quite close to me, so I decide to start chatting to him again

GB: I m8, how's u? I think we almost hooked-up last month ...

It takes him a short while to respond. Perhaps he's also eating his breakfast.

guy: yeah I remember
GB: well are u free this morning?
guy: been up with friends all night, gotta get some sleep soon

Hmmm, perhaps visiting him isn't such a good idea. He could be high on chems, chilled on dope, or simply a bit drunk!

GB: perhaps I'd better let u go then m8
guy: actually a quick session mite b just wot I needs 2 help me sleep
GB: uh-huh :-)
GB: but r u up to it m8, LOL
guy: we stopped drinking 3am, am well horny now ...

I look at my watch - that was over 6 hours ago so by now he should have sobered up. And since I know he lives close, it won't be too much hassle if it turns out to be a wasted visit!

GB: well it would be good to finally meet u m8! u wanna give me ur exact address and i'll be round in 15?

He tells me what I need to know and soon everything is agreed.

Each time I'd spoken to him I'd found out a bit more about him. First his name, then the rough area he lives, then the road, and finally now his exact address and mobile phone number. Of course a quick session suits me too, because with any luck I'll have time to visit him AND make it to the gym for my spin class! I rush upstairs to get some clean gym kit and set off.

As expected, it takes about 15 minutes to walk round to where he lives. Soon I'm ringing the bell to his flat. There's no automatic door release mechanism, so he has to come downstairs to let me in.

"Good to meet you at last", he says with a slightly tired smile on his face, "come on up".

Face to face he looks a bit friendlier than in the photos on his gaydar profile. And although he looks a bit tired, he doesn't seem drunk at all. I follow him up to the top floor of the house where his flat is.

"Nice place you've got here mate", I say looking round once inside, "do you share with anyone?"

"No", he says with a glint in his eye, "we're all alone :-)"

I give him a peck on his lips and rub the front of his shirt gently, finding his left nipple which is slightly erect.

En route to the gym via the bedroom"Hmmmm", he says smiling back, "let's go in here."

I follow him into his bedroom. Sitting on the side of his bed it doesn't take me long to strip off, while he does the same. Once I'm down to just the blue gym shorts that I'm wearing, I lean over and put my hand on his shoulder, kissing him properly now. He reciprocates eagerly, putting his arm round me as we recline back on the bed. We have a swift but through session.

"Are you Spanish at all", I ask him afterwards. "Judging by your accent you've been brought up in the UK, but one of your profile pics definitely looks a bit Spanish."

"Close!" he says, "I was brought up in Greenwich, and although my father was English my mother was Italian. I guess it's a Mediterranean look you spotted somehow!"

We chat for a bit while I drink my customary glass of water. I notice that there are quite a few empty bottles of wine on the dining table.

Suddenly I look at my watch. "Oh dear", I say, "I'd better be going. If I leave now I might just make it to my spin class at the gym."

"Blimey, you're full of energy aren't you", he says, "I'm gonna hit the sack for a few hours!"

"Well mate", I say laughing, "you certainly had a lot of energy just now for a guy who's been up all night!"

We agree to keep a lookout for each other online. Luckily it's only ten minutes walk to the gym from where the guy lives and I arrive with five minutes to spare. Today at least, I won't have to apologise to the gym staff for a missed spin class booking!

Saturday, July 08, 2006

A pornography connoisseur

Last night, I'm on MSN and I'm chatting to a reader called N who I've known through e-mail (and MSN) for a couple of months or so

N: ve u got any hot pics?
GB: got a few porno pics
N: send to me

I collected a very small amount of porn from the internet about five years ago, just after the original Napster died, using peer-to-peer file-sharing networks like limewire. Back then, music wasn't the only thing being shared, although I don't know if that's still the case or not. So I use MSN to send him a couple of pics, and a short 1MB cum-shot video which I think he'll enjoy because I know he likes engaging in web-cam activities!

N: ah those r old porn pic, lol

What on earth does he mean? From my memory at least, the male anatomy and body function haven't changed over the last few years! And it's not exactly "no one was wearing foreskins back in 1999 honey, but they're all the rage now!"

GB: old, why?
N: from the photo i think u can tell, the colour n stuffs

Guilty as charged! So I guess my porn is old-fashioned, untrendy, uncool :-(. As if it's not enough needing to have the latest ipod, and the latest aussieBum underwear, now one even has to keep one's porn collection up to date!

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

My worst online cruising experience. Ever!

It’s the last Wednesday in May, and I get home early evening after a hard day’s work. Boyfriend number 1 is visiting a friend of his so I’ve got the evening to myself. After pouring myself a beer I log into gaydar and to see if there’s any fun to be had.

Soon I spot a guy in his early 20’s who wants someone to visit him in central London, not too far away. I contact him to see if he’s interested in me:

GB: hi, I could visit you m8, I’m quite close to you
guy: where are you mate

I tell him where I live.

guy: ok

I wait a while for him to say something else but that single two letter word seems to be all that he's got to say for himself. He’s not showing much enthusiasm! No doubt he’s read my profile by now, perhaps I’m not his type? I decide to soldier on anyway.

GB: can u accom?
guy: yes

Ah-ha, I've now got a three letter word out of him :-)! I wonder even more whether he's worth visiting, especially since his profile doesn’t have any pics on it.

GB: any pics?
guy: yes cam phone
GB: I don't have a cam, sry
guy: ok, I hv no pics online
GB: oic, I think I can view pix on my phone

I’ve never been in a situation before where the only option was for the other guy to send a pic to my phone. Well I guess there’s a first time for everything, so I give him my number, with my usual instructions not to contact me unless it’s been agreed online first. In spite of his apparent lack of enthusiasm, his pic arrives quite quickly.

GB: nice pic on phone!
guy: thank
GB: so what kinda fun u after m8?

The who can do what to whom conversation turns out to be quite easy, so everything seems in order. Since he sent me a pic by phone, I’ve already got his mobile number, all I need is his address.

GB: happy to visit u m8, do you want to give me the address?
guy: i don't out my address like that i only give out when i know at people are on the way

By the time we reach this point a lot of guys are happy to divulge their address, but since I’ve got his mobile phone number I guess it’ll be OK without.

GB: so shall I set off to visit you now, I’ll phone for the address when I’m on my way?
guy: it up to you mate

What a strange reply! Throughout this conversation he’s been pretty luke-warm about everything, it doesn’t exactly fill me with confidence that it’ll be a worthwhile journey. But I fancy trying for a bit of fun before supper and he’s the best candidate.

GB: yeah, I'd like to, if that's ok with you
guy: you can if you want mate
GB: OK see you soon, I’ll phone you for the exact address

Before I logoff he does at least tell me which road junction to head for, that'll do for now.

There are plenty of taxis on the street, and it’s not long before I’m at the junction he told me to go to. I give him a call.

“Hi, it’s GB, I’ve arrived at that junction, so where do I go now?”

The directions are straightforward. Although this is quite a smart area of London, I find myself walking into a courtyard surrounded by what must be the only council housing in the area. He buzzes me into the building, and it turns out that he lives on the top floor. There’s no lift so I’m slightly out of breath by the time I get to his door.

“Ummm, come in”, he says. It’s slightly dark inside the apartment and I can’t see him properly, so I head inside to get a better look. He closes the door behind me.

Turning to look at him I get a shock. The photo he sent me can’t have been of him! And I don’t know what to do!! In all my years of having fun with men who I’ve met online, I’ve never been in this position before. I don’t have any doubt that he’s in his early 20’s, but he’s a slightly older version of a fat spotty teenager who eats junk food all day long. He could also do with a good bath.

“Thanks for coming round”, he says, looking slightly embarrassed.

“Errr”, what do I say, what do I say, “no problem”.

He smiles, and I get a glimpse of his teeth. OH MY GOD, he needs to visit a dentist badly! Suddenly the lack of enthusiasm that he showed online makes sense. Given that it was me pushing to visit him, and he made it abundantly clear that it was my decision, I’ve got less to complain about. None the less I was given false information.

“Let’s go in here”, he says, backing me into his bedroom. The bedroom is an untidy, unclean room, with dirty bed linen and with dirty bare floorboards waiting for a carpet to be laid.

I know I should leave but somehow I feel powerless. Perhaps I can just give him a quick hand job or something and make my escape? He can’t get much sex so the excitement of having someone else present should mean that it'll all be over quite quickly. I go to take off my shirt but he stops me.

“No, we'll leave our clothes on”.

This guy is really weird! Suddenly he puts his hand on my shoulder and reaches over to kiss me.

"Errrr, have you brushed your teeth?" I ask urgently.

He looks embarrassed and backs away.

A few minutes later he's taken down his grubby track-suit trousers and I’m wanking him off. “You’re lovely”, he says quietly, looking me in the eye. Poor guy, he can’t have many sexual encounters, even simple ones like this.

But after a few more minutes I don’t feel I’m making much progress.

“Are you going to cum for me?” I ask him gently, looking him in the eye now, with a cheeky smile which is meant to coax him into shooting his load.

“Errr, I can’t cum with other people present”.

What on earth does he mean? In that case, why did he even agree to let me come over?? But before I can decide on my next move it turns out that he lied. “Ahhhhh”, he says as he lets go, “.... hmmmm lovely, thank you so much”.

I end up feeling very sorry for him. He's probably the guy who everyone bullied at school. He's probably the guy who never got any love from his parents. He's probably the guy who never had any friends. None the less, it’s not a situation that I ever ever want to get myself into again.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

England vs Portugal: every cloud has a silver lining

I actually watched the last 90 minutes of the England against Portgual soccer game last night. And like any other hot blooded English male, I was bitterly disappointed to see my team defeated in the penalty shoot out. Unlike many of my fellow countrymen though I don't blame the manager, Sven-Göran Eriksson, who I think has done much better than his recent predecessors. One final thought on the subject - at least out of the two teams it's the team with the cutest players which has got through to the quarter finals!

Cristiano Ronaldo, Portugese hottieWayne Rooney, English hooligan

Saturday, July 01, 2006

A bit of fun on a business trip to the USA

Blow BuddiesBack in May, I had a business trip to the west coast of the United States to visit some clients. It was a punishing schedule, and there wasn’t much time for fun. Except that while in San Franciso, in a change to my usual online activities, I decide to visit an infamous gay cruising venue called Blow Buddies. I’ve visited these kind of places before of course, but not since I started blogging.

I reckon there’s a whole spectrum of gay sex venues. At one end of the spectrum there are the gay saunas, some of them almost clinically clean, with their swimming pools and café areas. Somewhere in the middle of the spectrum are the arcades and porn cinemas. At at the other end of the spectrum thare are places places like, well, Blow Buddies!

Blow Buddies is a private club, so you have to be a member to get in. But membership is immediately available for visitors like me as long as one presents some kind of photo-ID and pays the membership fee. So one evening, having read Joe.My.God's post about the place, I put on my sleaziest clothes, jump into a cab, and ask the driver to take me to 933 Harrison.

Entering the building I actually feel slightly nervous. ‘Don’t be so silly!’ I tell myself. Although it’s been a while since I visited anywhere this sleazy, I’m not exactly a novice at this sort of thing. Inside the foyer, since I’m not a member, the staff take me to one side and to explain the dangers of unsafe gay sex to me.
“... so we can provide so condoms in case you need any. We ask that you don’t wear any cologne or fragrances of any type. Oh, and it’s no smoking inside too, but there’s an outside yard at the back in case you want to have a cigarette”.

Once the lecture is over I pay the membership and admission fees, get my membership card, and I’m in. I check all my valuables into the cloakroom and go exploring.

Somehow it’s smaller than expected, and after about fifteen minutes trolling around I reckon I’ve got the place sussed:

Inside map of Blow Buddies

As I wander around, the area I’ve called Cruise Central on my map seems to be the busiest area, although it takes me a while to realise what’s actually going on. Above the main corridor that passes through one side of Cruise Central is a big screen that’s showing porn, but because it’s quite high up I walk past it at ground level several times before I realise that it's there. Around the outside of Cruise Central is a raised platform, a kind of corridor with chest high walls with glory holes down below. When I realise how it works, I’m quite impressed. There are guys standing on this platform with their members through the holes, watching the porn over the top of the walls, and the platform is at exactly the right height so that guys below are servicing the guys on the platform without having to bend down. Ingenious :-)!

Nearby there’s Whiz World. In case anyone has any doubt what this involves, a sign outside issues a helpful warning: on this adventure you’re going to get wet! When I take a peek inside though, there’s no one there. I would have expected a room like that to be quite smelly, but it’s not. Actually one might expect the whole venue to be smelly, given the quantity of body fluids that get spilt there, but again it’s not. I wouldn’t like to be the cleaner though!

Perched above the main level is a much smaller upstairs area, accessible by a couple of stairways as shown on the map. As well as being able to look down on all the activites below, this area also has a few cubicles, with glory holes of course, and with small TV’s showing porn. Down at ground level again, there are also a few mazes and darker areas, furnished with various useful items such as big chairs, slings, and cages. But throughout the entire venue, there’s one dominant feature. If there’s a wall, it’s almost bound to have a glory hole in it! Well, with a name like Blow Buddies, what does one expect?

I wander round, pausing sometimes to watch the kind of activities that one just doesn’t usually get to see in normal life. One thing’s for certain, there’s absolutely no privacy for anything one wants to do, but then I guess that’s part of the attraction!

For example, turning a corner in one of the darker areas, there’s a guy sitting naked in one of the big chairs. Although the surrounding area is dark, he’s quite well illuminated by a light shining on him directly from above. Kneeling at his knees is another guy. “Hmmm, that’s good, go on, suck that mushroom head, yeah, that’s right”, I hear the guy in the chair say. Slurp, slurp. "Yeah go on you cocksucker, take it deep throat, you know you like it".

Although there are some younger guys there, most of the clientelle is probably older than me. Similarly, there’s quite a diverse mixture of body types, with a few fit looking guys, and more not so fit guys.

I spend a couple of happy hours there. Of course, during my visit a few cc's of my own body fluids find a welcome home. Although I'm not usually into this very sleazy stuff, I must admit that I had a good time. Variety is the spice of life after all. And when I was ready to go back to the hotel, the Blow Buddies staff kindly phoned me a taxi too. What a fabulous service these guys provide!